Is Kissing Toads Necessary?

"Before you meet your handsome prince, you have to kiss a lot of toads."

I'm sure you've heard this old saying a time or to in your lifetime, especially if you group up watching the Disney princess movies. I always loved this quote and thought it was perfect for single ladies like myself. However, as I was reading it last week I really thought about it, and I decided that I disagree.

I mean, is it really necessary that each of us go and date a lot of "toads," or losers before we find prince charming? Not at all. We have to understand that God already has our husband picked out for us

. Dating all the wrong people, kissing them, and giving our emotions away to them--has absolutely NO effect on changing God's mind or persuading him to reveal your prince to you sooner.

It can however lead you to settle for a toad rather than the prince set apart for you.

Now if you have kissed a few toads don't worry, God still has a marvelous plan for you, just as long as you don't mess it up and settle for less than God's best.

When I think about all the husband stories I've heard from young women, three things always stand out in their stories. Before God blessed them by revealing their mate to them they had to:

1. Find confidence and peace with themselves. This includes being content with their looks and body--knowing that the way they are is a masterpiece from God and he meant for every part of them to look the way that it does. This also includes knowing their personalities and understanding their spiritual strengths and how they can use that to serve in God's kingdom work.
2. They gave their dating lives over to God. Praying and seeking his will in every area of their life, dating was no different. They stopped pursuing, manipulating, and trying. They simply said, "Here God, this is yours now. Do whatever you want to do with it, I have no power over you." They realized that their love story would be better written by God than by them (See: Give God the Pen.)
3. Finally, they stopped being consumed with dating, marriage, and boys--and they shifted all of their focus and attention to doing kingdom work--the work of God. Serving at their churches, discipling younger girls, consistently seeking God in every morning's quiet time. I always see God work soon after women fall completely in love with God, trusting him in EVERY area of their life.

I'm not presenting these things to you as the gospel, I am simply saying this has been the pattern for many girls around me who are now engaged or married. I really think it is God showing us to trust him more and worry less. We must not forget the work of his wonderful hands! :)

Psalm 145:4-5

"One generation will commend your works to another;

they will tell of your mighty acts.

They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty,

and I will meditate on your wonderful works."