As I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man I wish to keep.
One who is cute with a smile to share,
Who makes me laugh without a care.
One who remembers to call when he can,
Who isn’t a boy—but truly a man.
I pray for him to be sincere and true,
To admit when he hasn’t got even a clue.
He’ll open the door and ask what I need,
Holding my hand and taking the lead.
Oh find me a man who’s not easily annoyed,
Has a good job and is gainfully employed.
A man who knows how to make me feel good,
Loving me as only he could.
I pray that this guy will have a heart of gold,
And that our love will grow as we get old.
I know you will find him before it’s too late,
So as for now I will patiently wait.
§ GOD is the source of our love (Jesus)
§ JESUS is our example of love (his life)
§ THE HOLY SPIRIT is our power to love
§ We must rely on God for the power. Romans 5:5
§ Faith is the foundation,
§ Hope is the attitude,
§ And LOVE is the action.
§ God’s love is made complete when we love one another.
o 1 John 2:16 “For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world.”
o 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4 that each of you should learn to control your own body[a] in a way that is holy and honorable, 5 not in passionate lust like the pagans, who do not know God; “
o 1 Peter 4:3-8 “For you have spent enough time in the past doing what pagans choose to do—living in debauchery, lust, drunkenness, orgies, carousing and detestable idolatry. 4 They are surprised that you do not join them in their reckless, wild living, and they heap abuse on you. 5 But they will have to give account to him who is ready to judge the living and the dead. 6 For this is the reason the gospel was preached even to those who are now dead, so that they might be judged according to human standards in regard to the body, but live according to God in regard to the spirit. The end of all things is near. Therefore be alert and of sober mind so that you may pray. 8Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.”
o Proverbs 27:20 “ Death and Destruction[a] are never satisfied,
and neither are human eyes.”
o 1 John 4: 18 “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.”
o 1 John 4:7-8 “ 7 Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. 8 Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
Lust vs. Love
- What is Lust?
o Definition: lecherousness: a strong sexual desire; crave: have a craving, appetite, or great desire for self-indulgent (personified as one of the deadly sins)
o My Bible’s Definition: inappropriate and excessive desire or craving.
- What is Love?
o Love is a choice, not a feeling.
o You don’t fall into it. You choose to grow deeper in it. (you also don’t fall out)
o It does not come naturally. You have to work at it. Romans 12:9-19
§ People who are not cool, ugly, below us, etc.
§ Showing God’s grace. (undeserved gift)
§ It takes time, money, effort, energy
o Galatians 5:22- It’s a fruit of the Spirit “And the fruit of the spirit is love..”
o Galatians 5:14-it sums up the entire law “Love your neighbor as yourself.”
o John 15:13-14 Laying down your life- “Greater love has no man than this, he”
o 1 John 3:18-It’s not just words, “Let us not love in words and in tongue, but in action and in truth.”
Divine Dating- Part 3
“When You Date”
January 2, 2011
Memory Verse:
1 Thessalonians 5:17 J
Homework:
Read Isaiah 11:2 and pray this for wisdom in your dating life.
Figure out your boundaries and WRITE THEM DOWN!! Stick to em!
Long Term: Practice letting guys lead by trusting God.
Extra: Review “Why Guys Should Chase Girls” videos again on Youtube. The username is IceCube or something...I appologize for his cussword ahead of time. I'm not promoting that.
Part 3
When You Date
- “Dating” or “Talking”
o Boundaries
§ Know ahead of time and write them down!!
· Ex: I won’t kiss a guy I’m not dating, never hang out alone-temptation, no-no square rules
§ Early on let him know your boundaries
· I will not go any further than holding hands.
§ Pray for strength
§ Group dating makes keeping these boundaries a LOT easier!
o Accountability
§ Have a mentor, or close Christian friend that will help keep you accountable.
o Stick to your standards
§ If he turns out to be anything less, move on before either of you gets emotionally attached. Unless of course you enjoy getting hurt.
§ Pray for God’s guidance and wisdom.
· Isaiah 11:2 -pray this for wisdom
- Being in a relationship
o Let God lead
§ Pray continuously!! 1 Thessalonians 5:17
§ Stay in the word. Do your quiet times consistently.
§ Stay in his will—HE is the center of your life, not your man!!!
o Let him lead
§ Spiritually- you should know this before you agree to go out with him.
§ Emotionally- HE HAS TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE.
· To ask you out, to say he likes you, etc.
§ Girls DO NOT CHASE!!
· We weren’t made for it.
· They value stuff they chase more.
· We actually want to be chased.
o Princess/knight, attention, etc.
· It’s a turn off to most guys.
o Priorities
§ Faith
§ Family
§ Friends
All of the above were here first. You need both, not just him.
Don’t lose your friends/family/faith over a guy, because when you lose the guy you will have nothing.
§ Guys
This is a post from http://odb.org/2011/01/07/truly-amazing/. A special lady recommended it to me. :)
I read these words on a young woman’s personal Web site: “I just want to be loved—and he has to be amazing!”
Isn’t that what we all want—to be loved, to feel cared for by someone? And so much the better if he or she is amazing!
The one who fits that description most fully is Jesus Christ. In a display of unprecedented love, He left His Father in heaven and came to earth as the baby we celebrate at Christmas (Luke 2). Then, after living a perfect life, He gave His life as an offering to God on the cross in our behalf (John 19:17-30). He took our place because we needed to be rescued from our sin and its death penalty. “While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom. 5:8). Then 3 days later, the Father raised Jesus to life again (Matt. 28:1-8).
When we repent and receive Jesus’ gift of amazing love, He becomes our Savior (John 1:12; Rom. 5:9), Lord (John 13:14), Teacher (Matt. 23:8), and Friend (John 15:14). “Behold what manner of love the Father has bestowed on us, that we should be called children of God!” (1 John 3:1).
Looking for someone to love you? Jesus loves us so much more than anyone else possibly could. And He is truly amazing!
Amazing thought! that God in flesh
Would take my place and bear my sin;
That I, a guilty, death-doomed soul,
Eternal life might win! —Anon.
The wonder of it all—just to think that Jesus loves me.
Hey girls!“People date because they want to enjoy the emotional and even physical benefits of intimacy without the responsibility of real commitment.”
–Josh Harris in “I Kissed Dating Goodbye”
Divine Dating- Part 2
“How to be single”
December 27, 2010
Memory Verses:
1 Corinthians 7:34, Song of Songs 8:4
Extra: Philippians 4:12
Homework:
Proverbs 31- Study and add to your list of Godly characteristics you want as a wife.
Long Term: Work on your list a little bit at a time, gradually becoming who you want to be. Pray continuously that God’s will would be above yours in your dating life. Trust him.
Extra: Check out the rest of Song of Songs!
Part 2
How to be single
Singleness: It’s a gift! We take it for granted.
Only a short time in your life-celebrate!!
More free time and energy
- Enjoy Singleness!
o Work on your relationship with God.
§ 1 Corinthians 7:34-memorize.
o Love your friends more deeply.
§ Call them just to say hey, invite them to do fun activities with you
§ Girl’s night out!! :D
o Develop your hobbies and talents
§ Instead of spending all your time and energy with a relationship, try something new! If you like basketball, practice it and get better! Like to read then read!
o Enjoy the company of your family
§ Trust me, you may get annoyed now, but before you know it you will be moving off to college and then you will really miss them.
§ The time you have with them now, under their roof, is priceless.
§ Spend more time with your sister/brother, mother-daughter dates, learn from your Dad J
o Adopt a mentor/mentoree
§ Ask an older GIRL or WOMAN to mentor you..meet once a week to discuss godly things and life in general.
§ Or adopt a younger girl that you can pour into. Ask around at church, school, neighbors, etc. You’d be surprised how fun it can be!
o Study.
§ Schoolwork, ACT, scholarships, applications…
- Work on godly characteristics
o You don’t become a perfect woman over night when you get married…
o Practice being a godly wife now. If you want a godly husband, you must become a godly wife.
o Write a list of standards for yourself and slowly work on them:
§ Proverbs 31-study and go over in your quiet time. Add to list.
§ Ephesians 5:23- Christ-husband-wife. (Lots of evidence and explanation that we don’t have time for tonight)
§ Ephesians 5:33- Respect your husband. Work on respecting others.
§ Collossians 3:18- wives submit to your husbands, practice submitting to parents and authority
§ 1 Peter 3:1-6- Respect, purity, reverence, inward beauty, gentle, quiet spirit, submissive, obedient.
§ 1 Peter 3:8-9- harmony, sympathetic, compassionate, humble, blessing
§ Proverbs 11:16- kindhearted
§ Proverbs 11:22- discretion (Freedom to act or judge wisely on your own)
§ Proverbs 12:4-noble character
§ Proverbs 21:19- don’t argue or quarrel
What if you are struggling? Being single is hard work sometimes…
- Wait
o Song of Songs
o How many of you have read it?
§ It’s basically the romance-novel of the Bible. Very intense.
§ King Solomon and his wife/fiancé.
§ It’s is a beautiful love story portraying the way a marriage should be.
o Chapter 2:3-7
§ A girl head over heals in love with her husband. “faint with love” and guess what her advice is to her single friends?
§ “Daughters Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and by the does of the field: do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires.”
§ Read Ch 3:5
· Again, do not awaken love until it so desires.
§ Read and memorize Ch 8:4
· Don’t chase, lead, etc. (Covered more later)
§ Pray for a love like this.
§ Be a wall not a door. (Read 8:8-9)
- Pray and Trust God
o Phil 4:6-Pray, leave it, and go on. Repeat as necessary.
o Proverbs 3:5-6- Trust him with all your heart and he will make your paths straight.
o He will bring the right guy at the right time, don’t rush it.
o Pray that he will take away your desire to date until the time is right.-I did.
o Pray for God to fill you up and keep you satisfied as a single person.
o Chill, relax. Breath, it’s okay. Romans 8:28—he’s working for the good of us who love him
o Philippians 4:12
§ The secret to happiness is learning to be content in any and every situation. This includes singleness.
§ Verse 13 says I can do all things through him who gives me strength. Pray about it.
God has a plan for your life. He knows when everything is going to happen. We girls spend entirely too much time worrying about stuff we have no control over.
Freedom comes in knowing everything will be okay, and trusting God to step in and take control rather than you.
Breathe this week. Exhale control, inhale freedom.
