It's About Love

Dear, sweet, child--never forget that you are loved.  Don't forget you are wanted, sought after and valued.  The God of all the universe designed you intricately and lives to watch you bloom.  He poured his heart into your creation and his eyes never leave your delicate face.  Sweetheart, you are perfect just the way you are.  You don't need affirmation from friends, media or boys.  The great affirmer has called your heart wonderful.  You mustn't fret when the attention withers, but rejoice in the companionship of the Lord.

The Lord who loves you sent himself in human form to prove this to you.  He's showing off so that you will notice the depth of his love for you.  Jesus stretched his arms far and wide and he thought of you when he said, "Sweet child, come home.  Run into these arms of mine and rest in my love.  I need you to need me.  I want you to want me.  It hurts me when you turn away, but all the while I have never stopped loving you and I never will.  You are my precious child and I desire to show you more of my passion for you and all the earth.  Come near to me and I will never forsake you."

It's the love of the father that changes lives.  It's the power in his whisper and the undeniable strength in his voice.  Easter pageants aren't the cure.  10am isn't the magical time.  I cannot help you.  Only Jesus.  Jesus is love and love endures all things.  Love never fails.

Love him.  He first loved you.

Love him.  He will never leave you.

Love him, because you need something constant in this life and the next.

Love him so you can be full of life and vigor and meaning.  Everything else is just a chasing after the wind.  Sadly, even your success and degrees and fortune cannot go with you when you leave this world.  Only your soul and what you left behind in the lives of others.

Live a life of love.  Love the Lord your God with your total heart, soul and mind.  Then turn around and pour that love into other people.  Those are our two commandments, the ones that speak truth and shatter lies.
Love. endures. all. things.

Christ is risen, and he is alive.  Easter Sunday is about the remarkable love he showed for us then, and now and continues to show us.

It's about love.

Roar!

Katy Perry has recently released a song entitled "Roar."  From the moment I heard it, I have absolutely loved this song and have cheered it on as it reaches the top of the charts.  If you've heard the song you might be able to guess why I'm an advocate.  The lyrics scream empowerment and boldness--something God is forever teaching me.  I have written several posts about this in the past; all stemming from me reading the book "Boundaries" by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend.  (Here is a link to that book review: "Boundaries.")

"Roar" encourages people to speak up to people who have knocked them down in the past.  This could be bullies, critics, antagonists, or anyone who doesn't believe in you.  I am all about self-respect and individual confidence.  In fact I write positive things about myself every morning during my quiet time, especially towards the parts of my life where I lack confidence.  This daily exercise helps me remain focused and confident for what God has prepared me to do.  Katy Perry really is a great catalyst for promoting good self-esteem in individuals.  "Firework" is another great song she sings that is along the same lines as is great for boosting self-confidence.  (Would be a great morning-pump-up song.)

Very similar to self-confidence is what I call God-confidence.  The two ideas are very related but separate at the same time.  We can't stand up for God if we don't believe in ourselves, but at the same time God gives us the power to do anything.  If God calls you to take a stand on something, you best believe he will give you the strength to do that.  The strength to stand up for ourselves, our beliefs, and our God all comes as a gift from above, however we must tap into that gift in order to use it for the Kingdom.

God has been revealing these ideas to me through studying the boldness that Jesus and his devout disciples displayed.  Sunday at church we looked at a passage in Acts chapter 16.  The story is about Paul and Silas getting thrown in prison for being very blunt about their belief in Jesus Christ, son of the living God.  This is an obvious bold act on their part.  I wonder how many of us today would be willing to go to prison for believing in God.  Many do it overseas, but would any here in America?  Are we that dangerous? Are we willing to be that brave?  

Although this is huge, it was something Paul said later that struck me as bold.

While Paul and Silas sat in prison, they prayed and worshipped while the other prisoners listened.  Again, that is pretty bold.  Imagine if you were sitting on cold hard concrete in a dirty prison full of rapists and murderers.  Everyone has hard looks on you as they size you up--anticipating what your weakness is and why you too were locked up.  Just as the biggest, ugliest, meanest looking one steps forward...you start praying and singing hymns to God.  Wait..what?!

Yeah, I'm definitely not that bold yet.

Anyhow so while they are singing and praying a sudden earthquake happens and all of the prisoner's chains are released.  The guard realizes what has happened and is about to kill himself when Paul screams out, "Don't harm yourself! We are all here!"

That's the line that got me.
Again, Paul screams out: "Don't harm yourself! We are all here!"

To me this would have been the boldest move.
Allow me to explain:

My mind likes to piddle back and forth with promoting the "whatever happens, happens" theory and the "if you want something to happen you have to make it happen" theory.  On one side I watch everything fall into place the way God planned it, whether we like it or not.  He is ultimately in control, and although a man makes plans in his heart, it is the Lord who determines his steps (Proverbs 16:9.)  We live best when we lean back and enjoy the ride.

On the contrary I see free will being a huge thing in that if we want something we must go get it.  If we want out of sin we need to pray to be changed, not sit and wait for God to convict us.  An example of this is "Flee from the devil and the devil will flee from you." (James 4:7)  In order for God to do something for us, we have to make a step toward him first.

I may over-think things, but then I look around at people and I think, Why isn't that person my friend?  Well, I suppose it just didn't happen..we don't have the connection.  If it was meant to be it would have happened.  Yet when we look at Jesus and Paul they took the opposite approach.  More like..HEY BE MY FRIEND!  

Okay so not quite that weird, but if I had been in Paul's situation at the jail; watching the guard pick up his sword and edge towards killing himself, I probably would be the one to sit their and watch with wide eyes, asking myself the whole time why God thought I needed to see someone die.  I admit that I probably would not have even thought about opening my mouth and telling the dude to quit.

Now let's bounce to John 18:1-11.  Jesus is in an olive grove with some of his disciples.  Long story short a fight breaks out and when Peter retaliates in attempt to protect Jesus, Jesus commands Peter to "put his sword away!"

Again, to me it looks like Jesus is less about the laid-back, watch-it-happen approach, and more about the stay-in-control-of-the-situation.  Both Jesus and Paul made changes in their environment by speaking up and acting out about the evil going on around them.

This is so challenging for me because although I am getting better, I still have a hard time telling people what they don't want to hear.  It is hard for me to cause conflict, even if it is menial.

The more I grow as an adult and a Christian, the more I am challenged to stand up for what I really want and ignore everyone who says I can't.  If God calls me to do it, I can.

Writing for example is a huge thing.  I am 100% certain God uses me through my writing.  He inspires my writing and he will continue to do this throughout my life.  Because of this bold certainty, I am constantly being attacked by Satan about my writing.  Every post leaves me in fear.  Fear of being unwanted.  Fear of being misunderstood.  Fear of my ideas being rejected by those I love most.  But that's the beauty of writing, it is incredibly scary in that God asks writers to be completely honest, humble and boldly-spoken.  You can't write truth if you aren't bold enough to proclaim it.

My writing professor always challenged us to be more vulnerable, because that's when it hurts, and  that's when people start to connect.

So today I challenge you to gauge your boldness as you go about your everyday activities.  What situations would cause Jesus to speak up?  Where do you feel the Lord challenging you to take a stand?  Is there something he's called you to that others don't necessarily agree with?  Pray through Proverbs 28:1 several times throughout the day and see where God takes you.

Proverbs 28:1

"The wicked man flees though no one pursues, but the righteous are as bold as a lion."

"You hear my voice, you hear that sound
like thunder gonna shake the ground.

You held me down, but I got up
get ready cause I've had enough."
--Katy Perry "Roar" lyrics

My Hair Identity Crisis

(Written a few months ago...)

"...but if a woman has long hair, is it her glory?"

1 Corinthians 11:15

Some of you may find this humorous (men,) but ladies, I think the majority of you can relate to this post.  For the past 2 weeks...wait, scratch that...more like the last month, I have been trying to decide what to do with my hair.  My last color job was back in December, and so my roots are nearly to my ears now.

Some days I would wake up and just marvel at my natural-colored roots peaking in.  I loved that color!  How long it had been since I had seen a full head of that tint.  Perhaps I should take the time to grow out all of my artificial coloring.  I mean, the half and half hair color is in style, not to mention hipsters.
Do you think God gets mad at me for changing the color he gave me?
How will people categorize me differently?
Am I really a "hipster-earthy" type of person?

The next morning was the complete opposite.  I love being blonde, it's my personality!  I've always been a fun, outgoing type of person, and blonde just always seemed to fit.  Plus, in my neck of the woods it's all about glam, high-hair, and jewelry (see Country Girl post) that type of style did not work well with muddied roots and an unkempt mane.
I think colored hair gives me a more professional look, and since I am entering the professional world, I need to keep a nice outward appearance.
I've always been known as a glamour girl--hair is what I do.
Then again, am I really an outwardly focused person?  I spend 20 minutes in front of the mirror max.


Ahhh this decision was beginning to drive me crazy!  Who knew that something as simple as a color job would take up so much of my free thinking time.  I found myself judging my hair at work, at school, and at church.  What hairstyle will encapsulate all of who I am?  How do I want the world to perceive me?

One night in the middle of this early-life crisis, I was explaining to one of my close guy friends how complicated this decision was.  Profoundly and yet obliviously, he responded, "So this is like an identity issue for you girls, huh?"

Wow.  I never thought of it like that before.  He went on to explain that one of the most insecure women he knows, dyes her hair different colors all the time.  Perhaps he was on to something!

Later that night I really started thinking about his observation.  My first hair coloring was when I was 13--a very insecure time in my life.  I wanted just a few small blonde highlights to fit in better with the girls at school.

9th and 10th grade came with all sorts of pressures and adjustments--including my hair-dentity.  First it was blonde, then red, then dark brown, blue, pink, and green.  I would have loved to go pitch black, but thankfully my mother wouldn't allow it.

After my 10th grade year, God grabbed hold of my heart an worked a drastic life change within me.  One of the first things I was convicted about was my fashion choices, and with that came the mane.  I dyed my hair all over a rich, bold red to signify the new creation I was transforming into.  I was returning to school a different person, and I wanted my hair to reflect that.

Red hair is rare, unique, bold.  That's exactly who God was calling me to be that year.  So for an entire year (which is forever in hair years,) I kept my hair that same bold red color, until Junior prom.  I had to dye my hair to compliment the dress of course!

Senior year is a place of really figuring out where you want to go in life.  Who do you want to be after high school?  Oddly enough, my hair reflected this too.  I returned to a more natural hair color for most of the year, adding only a few highlights for Senior prom.

Two weeks before beginning college, I sliced off ten inches of my infamously long hair.  I was showing the world, and my junior college, that I meant business.  Life was mine for the taking, and that's what I wanted people to understand.

Now my hair is long with hardly any layers--something I attribute to this "city style" I'm surrounded by.  I still don't know what color I want to be, in terms of hair, but I have come to terms with the fact that it reflects my identity for each season of life.

At the same time, I am completely relieved to know that my identity is not based solely on the color of dye I decide to use.  As I explained in an earlier post What is Identity, God is the only place where lasting identity is found.  People, sports, and hair change, but God doesn't.  He is eternal and forever, therefore my identity in him is unwavering, no matter what color of hair I decide to have.

Upon this realization, I prayed.  I asked God to show me the insecurities that were seeping out through my hair.  Why am I not fully trusting you with every part of me?  At this spiritual age and time in my life, I wouldn't think hair-dentity would be a problem, but it is.  "Search me Oh, God and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts."  (Psalm 139:23)  I'm yours for the taking father, show me my trust issues.

What do you think?  Am I basing my identity in hair instead of Christ?

Where do you put your identity?

Do you think God wants us to always stay the way he naturally designed us?

What does the Bible have to say about this issue?

Give God the Pen

"Truly God gives the very best to those who leave the choice with him."

--Hudson Taylor

A friend of mine gave me this quote today after I had a very good quiet time about this very thing. I have been continuously learning that the more we let go, the more God steps in and does miraculous things that are far better than what we had planned. This has proven itself true in countless areas of my life, and I know it is the truth in the live's of others too. But today let's look at how this can affect our dating lives specifically.

There's a book by Leslie Ludy called "When God Writes Your Love Story." Although I have never read this book, the title has been imprinted in my mind over and over again. I told God many years ago that I wanted him to have complete and total control over my love life--and he has had that. This is so important to me because I know if I'm in control I will screw up and settle for something that's not that great. I also know that if I let God work out the plans he already has for me, I will be blessed beyond my imagination (Ephesians 2:10, Jeremiah 29:11, Ephesians 3:20.)

Join me for a short trip into your future: Years from now when you are looking back on your life, you think about how you and your husband met. You remember how ya'll met, who pursued who, who arranged the dates, how God was represented, and why you married that man. This can either be a joyous reflection that ensures you of how much your husband loves you and God provided for you, or this could be a scary reflection that causes doubts to rise in the back of your mind.

In the second scenario, this reflection could cause doubts and uncertainty to creep into your marriage because you realize that you are the one who arranged the marriage.

You think about it, and you texted him first.

You arranged the dates.

You pressured him into purposing,

and you did not seek God or friends advice on the subject at all.

So what makes you so sure he wanted to marry you in the first place? --says the devil.

You think about it, and you have no idea. You think, yeah...why didn't he pursue me? Was I not good enough? Was it not God's will?

Why did I have to force everything to happen? Hmm...

Manipulating, asking guys out, texting them first, arranging get togethers--that's not going to be a story of fate, destiny, or God's planning. That is a story of control, impatience, and insecurity.

Look at the alternative scenario. After reflecting on this love story you feel overwhelmed by God's grace and goodness. You are speechless to think that the man in the other room wanted you bad enough that he prayed about you, sought guidance from elders about you, and he took the time and courage to consistently pursue your heart.

Afterall, he did text you first.

He arranged the first date.

He surprised you with the purposal,

and countless friends, mentors, and pastors confirmed your relationship as a work of God.

This guy is obviously head over heels for you...even more now than he was then. --says the Lord.

You think about it. Yes! Lord, you are SO right! You have confirmed this relationship over and over again.

I know without a doubt in my heart that this man loves me and that he is the one you promised me years ago.

With a humbled heart and joyful soul you say:

Lord, Thank you for writing my love story.

Patient waiting, trusting, and depending on God--letting the man lead and develop the relationship--receiving advice and confirmation from spiritual leaders and mentors...THAT is a story of faith, love, destiny, and God's perfect planning.

Ladies, please. Let God write your love story.

"Life is like..a movie?"

So, I know I said this week would be all about movies, but what I am about to write isn't exactly what I had in mind, however I feel like I should share it with you all.

The past few weeks of my life have seemed like a movie themselves. 2 weeks ago I had the most intense week of my LIFE. I went through what seemed like a roller coaster, I had extremely joyous moments, and then I had very painful crushing moments, back and forth all week long.

On Monday of that week i got into a major fight with my best friend for the first time ever.

Tuesday I found out I was flunking Spanish and I made an F on my first test, Wednesday I was

overwhelmed with joy by seeing some special friends of mine, who I

have prayed for for years, start to seek God with all their heart. Thursday I was informed I have to take yet another semester of Spanish when I thought this would be my last. I know that sounds dramatic, but it seriously broke my heart. :( Also Thursday I found out I won a prestigious award! Friday I got to have 2 really intense, God-inspired conversations with 2 people who are placed very heavily on my heart and in my prayers--that was DEFINITELY the high of the week!!

Throughout all the chaos and drama of that week, I really felt like I grew a huge leap closer to God. He taught me about patience, forgiveness, humility, and discernment. He taught me to rely on him more for inner-strength, and to trust him even when I have no idea what's going on in my life. I was amazed with how God worked through the craziness of the week.

Sunday after that I was exhausted but ready for the next week. Monday morning I got prayed up and prepared! However as last week went on, it seemed not quite as crazy as the week before, but still pretty intense. Praying about my living situation, getting extremely home sick like never before, learning things about myself I never knew, and lots more. I feel like God had a few major things he started to reveal to me last week. There were 2 or 3 themes that kept coming up at bible study, discipleship, and worship. Every time I talked with one of my spiritual leaders i felt God nudging me more and more into this openness of dealing with things. I haven't understood what he is doing yet, but I feel like this week and next week will be intense learning from God. Prayers

would be appreciated on this!

I guess the point of this is, that life can be crazy. No wait, life usually is crazy--almost like a movie at times. The only sane thing in our lives is what never changes, and that is Jesus Christ. He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow (Hebrews 13:8.) When it feels like your friends hate you, your parents don't understand, and boy don't pay attention to you..know this: God is ALWAYS there. Don't think of that as a cliche either. Know without a shadow of a doubt that

you receive that F and your heart is broken, GOD CARES. Look upward and pray to him. Tell him your hurts, your pains, your desires. Let him cleanse you and then get up and let him instill his power within you so you can march on toward the goal (Philippians 3:14.) For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7.) Amen!

Guys the ONLY way I have gotten through the last two weeks is my dependence on God. If I wasn't a strong believer of God and what he can do I probably would have sunk into depression. God is the only thing that I can depend on, and that makes him the one thing I seek after with all my heart and soul. Do you know him like that?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Has your life been like a dramatic movie lately? Maybe a horror film? How did you handle it?

Could it have turned out better if you would have depended on God a little more?

How bout memorizing a verse to quote every time you need reassurance.

Psalms 73:23-26

"Yet I am always with you;

you hold me by my right hand.

You guide me with your counsel,

and afterward you will take me into glory.

Whom have I in heaven but you?

And earth has nothing I desire besides you.

My flesh and my heart may fail,

but God is the strength of my heart

and my portion forever."